Meatless: The Roadshow

Wow.

Lots of powerful lessons learned since last Wednesday. Here they are in order.

1)Unless you specify that you are a non-dairy eating vegetarian when attending a catered event, you're simply screwed.

I didn't want to make a big show of it, but I realized that instead of emailing the coordinator and letting her know I have vegan tendencies, I just made a bigger spectacle. I sulked, I starved, I complained. I ate cheese. When you go to a pizza party at a bowling alley with free drinks, you need something in your tummy. Practically anything can become a "vegetarian" option, but man, I do not envy people who are true vegans. The world is a hard, hard place to live in. I felt guilty about eating all the cheese, especially in light of what I committed to at the leadership conference I was at (which I will address in #2), but, at least I held my ground on the eggs.

I love eggs so much. When I walked into the conference room (a little hungover) on Thursday morning and saw a tray of fluffy, wonderful eggs, it was the saddest day of my life. But no way was I eating a egg that came from a factory farm. So, I ate fruit for breakfast, felt pity for myself and my need for a greasy hangover remedy, and watched everyone else eat their eggs while I wondered what kind of life the hen that hatched them came from. It caused me a lot of anxiety, also a lot of self-questions: "Am I becoming a crazy person? How do other people not think this is a problem? People are going to start thinking I am a crazy person. How do I turn these thoughts off!!!"

I also had an existential crisis at dinner Thursday night, when I received my meal well after everyone else had been served. They informed me that they had accidentally forgot to leave the pancetta out of my meal the first time they made my food, so they had to make me a new plate. I felt so sad - like that poor pig had died twice. Not only did it die, but it was wasted in a meal that had to be thrown out. I felt like I was in a moral dilemma. Was I worse for making them throw it away? Seriously, I need a food therapist or something...being a vegetarian is really messing with my mind.

Lesson learned. Next time I attend any sort of a function, event, conference, or wedding - I'll make sure to send notice. I never knew how difficult it could be to find an acceptable meal option, or recover from a hangover on orange juice and pineapple chunks.

2) If you're going to an airport, pack your own shit to eat or prepare to eat nuts, fruit, and maybe pretzels or salad if you're lucky. That is all.

3) The leadership program I am in for work is great because it is all about professional growth, but provides insights that can relate to your personal life. This session was all about who you are, your VIBE (Values, Interests, Beliefs, and Energy Sources) as our facilitator called it. As we explored who we are and what we stand for, we were tasked to come up with a mission statement and an action plan to hold ourselves accountable towards. Mine was that I will always be true to myself and genuine with others. The subtext of that for me is that I will try to live a life where my actions align with my beliefs. Going veg was a good way to start for me.

The most important lesson - the only thing you have total control over is yourself.

4)Having a support system or someone you can identify with is great.

Jeff and my friend Susan picked me up from the airport on Friday so we could go to visit Susan's brother Ron (who is also one of my best friends) and his girlfriend Nicole this weekend at their place about 2 hours outside of my place in Chicago. Susan is already one of the most generous people I know (she picked me up at Midway Airport in Chicago rush hour traffic, after driving from Detroit for 5 hours), but she is also a vegetarian. It was great to talk to someone about what they eat, and to see that she was concerned about making sure we had options for dinner.

5) Your friends have your back no matter what.

My friend and Susan's brother Ron and I have had a history of meat-eating together - grilling, eating out, you name it - we have always been very close since college when we became friends. I was really worried, since I was staying at his house this weekend, that he would give me a hard time. He's like a brother to me, and I know that when I tell my actual brothers, they will never let me live down the fact that I am a vegetarian now. I expected Ron to treat me the same way. But he didn't. He didn't taunt me, or tempt me, or even question why I did it, and that made me feel a lot more comfortable.

This reminded me of a night a few weeks back. I went to two of my friend's (Colleen and Denise - sisters) house for a girl's night. Colleen works as what I lovingly call a "meat marketer." I was worried to tell her that I became a vegetarian because of who she is - her job, the town she comes from, what she believes in. It didn't matter to her. She got me a veggie option for dinner, and we drank wine all night and talked like we usually do. She even listened to my reasons for going veg.

Bottom line: Your friends are your friends, and if they are good ones, what you eat won't matter.

So, a rough, but great week. I got through it: traveling, having to sit through catered seminars, drinking with old friends - and I am have come out on the other side, still meatless. I'm really proud of myself, but there wasn't really ever a doubt. Still, it feels good to know that no matter what the situation, I'm strong enough in my basic belief to weather it. Now I just had to be as strong with cheese.